If Period Drama Characters had Internet Bios

(I had a LOT of fun writing this post, I hope you like it!) (Also, what say you of my new header?)


DOWNTON ABBEY

@LordGranthamofDowntonAbbey Times are changing. We must move with the times.
@Lady_Cora // American mom // Wife of my darling // Blue eyes // ESFJ // Downton is life //
@Mary_Crawley Don't pay attention to the things I say, unless it's about my inheritance
@Edith002 remember that u r good enough no matter what people say. #shakeitoff #hatersgonnahate
@SybilCrawley Woman's rights, nursing and being passionate about the world. Sign this petition!
@Matthew_Crawley I like cycling. Maybe one day I'll get used to cars.
@THE_DOWAGER_COUNTESS whereisthespacebutton?
@Isobel_thegreat I know where the space button is.
@the_Tom_Branson Irish. I'm a cool dude in a uniform. Let's run away together. #RIPtheTsar.
@Carsonthebutler Tradition is the key to stability. If you have time to lean, you have time to clean.
@Mrs_Hughes I'm the one holding the keys.
@CookingPatmore red hair and purple dress. i need to go and cook.
@John_Bates that controversial guy with a black coat and a cane. #FreeBates
@blondemaidAnna Hopelessly in love with @John_Bates // Do what you love and love what you do. // #FreeBates
@Gwen Future secretary    maybe
@Daisy_190 i cant decide about my bio so i guess this is it??
@BlackThomas #dontfreebates #smokingisgoodforyou #lifesucks
@Sarah_o_Brian Playing tricks on people is fun as long as it doesn't involve bars of soap. #smokingisgood
@William_Mason the piano, @Daisy_190, and the war.


PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

@MrBennet My wife forced me to be online.
@Mamma_Bennet i have 5 single daughters but the oldest is dating a man of large fortune!!!
@Jane_Bennet #blessed to be @CharlesBingley's girlfriend, but that doesn't mean I love anyone any less!
@Lizzy_Bennet Lover of walks, books and good friends. Dislike proud people.
@Marythereader Sesquipedalian //sɛskwɪpɪˈdeɪlɪən// a person who uses long words
@Kitty_Bennet Older than my younger sister.
@Lydiaprincess999LOL Denny is the hottest jk love u too Wickham LOL!!§è! Follow4follow?
@Fitzwilliam_Darcy I often sit in my library.
@CharlesBingley I love my life, parties, birds, London and @Jane_Bennet
@Caroline_B Intelligent modern woman & warning: I will stalk you.
@MrCollinsthejust Honoured to work for @LadytheBough i'm single and ready to mingle.
@Charlotte_Lucas 27 years old and still haven't paid my student loans.
@LadytheBough I am very particular about the way people address me and talk to me. Once I was horrified.
@Ann_theBough
@Georgiana_Darcy "Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without." - Conficius
@Wickhamiscool Hey there. Once I was rich but something happened so now I rely on my looks. Follow4follow. 


SENSE AND SENSIBILITY

@Elinor_Dashwood "There is nothing more uncommon than common sense" - Frank Lloyd Wright
@Mariannethepassionate2 Follow yr heart! Green hills, poetry, music + @Whilloughby_yeah make me burst with joy
@Margaretthecurly3 I'm actually to young for Instagram shhh don't tell Elinor.
@Mama_Dashwood i agree with marianne
@Edward_F Interested in books, Church and kind people. Facing consequences of past mistakes is inevitable.
@Whilloughby_yeah i believe in living the now, seizing the moment, marianne, and love.
@Colonel_Brandon Patience is a virtue; Music is happiness; Love is loyalty.
@JENNINGS_themrs Olives r life! Matchmaker since the crib! Comment if u have any ideas about mysterious Mr F!
@JohnMiddleton I TELL REALLY FUNNY JOKES.
@AdorableLucySteele Engaged to a Ferras! Life is good!
@I_am_Fanny Want nothing but the best for my son and husband. Norland is home.
@JohnDashwood I tried my best.
@Mr_Palmer Shut up.
@Charlotte_Palmer_hi Hi I'm Charlotte call me Lot i have a hilarious husband and i'm preggers and i hate rain and newspapers but not really ha! #lifeisgood #sometimesbad #mostlygood

46 comments:

  1. THIS IS THE BEST EVER.

    *dies laughing*

    I'm serious, this is the funniest thing you may have ever written!!!! Right on. I love it. :-)

    (I think the S&S ones are my favorites. But they're all hysterical.)

    (And the header is lovely!)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. ARE YOU OKAY? Did you die? :-P

      Seriously, thank you Ems. :-) I'm so glad you thought it was funny. To be funny is one of my highest ambitions, as you know. :-P

      Delete
  2. This is hysterical. You're so adorable! Also, your header is excellent. x

    (Did you see how I wrote in bio length? Going with the theme...)

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    1. Jillian, thanks!!! :-D I'm glad you like the header too... I'm quite proud of it.
      (OHHHH YES CLEVER CLEVER.)

      Delete
  3. Brilliant, Naomi, perfectly brilliant! I'm laughing right now, you hit every single person spot on! :)

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    1. Aww thank you so much, Eowyn! :-) Glad it made you laugh... :-)

      Delete
  4. Love the new header, it's adorable.
    God bless,
    Torri❤

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  5. OH MY GOSH I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING!!!!!!!! Naomi. how did you get Margaret so perfectly?! and Mr. Bennet!! oh my. this is my utmost favorite post and I think I'll just sit here and read it again and again xD

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  6. This was hilarious XD You hit this RIGHT on the head!!!! "single and ready to mingle" "preggers" "#blessed" just yes!!!! And your header is #goals!!

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    Replies
    1. Hahaha, thanks!
      "preggers" usually makes me cringe but it fits with Charlotte Palmer. :-P

      Delete
  7. I LOVE your new header!!! It's so fun and inviting! :) :) :)

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    1. Aw, thank you - it's different than what I've ever done, but I'm loving it.

      Delete
  8. OH MY GOODNESS, this is hilarious!! XD
    Your new header is so cute, by the way! :)

    ~Liv
    oliviakfisher.blogspot.com

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  9. Love it, especially the Pride and Prejudice ones! The Mr. Collins one cracked me up :D

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    1. I first just had Mr Collins write about Lady Catherine, but then I thought, nope, I have to add something creepy to this bio. So I added, 'single and ready to mingle.' :-P Ha.

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  10. I am snorting at my phone on the train .. oh bravo!

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  11. This is brilliant, Naomi! I've been working on my bio, after reading your last post. Hopefully, I can come up with something good soon... :D

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    Replies
    1. My last post wasn't really critising anyone - just some random thoughts. :-P Thanks, Ria!

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  12. This was ridiculously clever.:) I love how you managed to capture everyone's character in just a few words. My favorites are definitely Kitty Bennet and Mrs. Bennet! And of course Lydia.XD Love your new header!

    ~Rilla Blythe

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  13. This was so much fun to read! Especially the Dowager and Isobel, I could totally see them saying that. And I like the header! It's autumnal but in a fresh and unexpected way :)

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  14. YESSSS. I think Mr Palmer's is my favorite :D <3 but they're all so good! And I think your header is really cute.

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  15. haha! I love Lidia's and how Ann's is just silence...

    Very cute header! Fall is in the air!

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    Replies
    1. hahah, glad someone noticed the Ann-silence. My sister thought I'd forgotten to write down something and I was like, 'noooo it was SUPPOSED to be that way.' :-P

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  16. THIS IS HILARIOUS. Oh my word, YOUR BRAIN. :O Can I share it?!

    (I just realized those last two sentences were well and truly creepy. I guess I'm just hoping you know what I mean. ;P)

    It's all ssooo cleverrr! My favourites are Ann de Bough, Charlotte Palmer's, Mrs. Jennings's and Lydia Bennet's. :D But they're all SPOT ON.

    Oh, and your new header is super cute. :)

    ~Miss Meg

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  17. I LOVE THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

    Mr. Palmer: "Shut up."

    *dies laughing*

    That one was my favorite, but honestly they're all perfect . . . Oh, and the "#FreeBates" thing really cracked me up ;-)

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  18. I tried to change a guffaw into a lady like chuckle and ended up scaring everyone with the weird sounds I made. Whoops.

    (I really love your new header. It's adorable.)

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  19. Mrs. Jennings. Oh, Mrs. Jennings. That one really made me laugh. :)

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  20. Bahahaha! Mr. Palmer's and Tom's were the crack.

    Clever post Naomi!

    Miranda Jo

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  21. NAOOOOMI! Goodness, girl! This was HILARIOUS! How DO you come with stuff like this??!

    There were SO many good ones in here but some of my favorites were Thomas' (#lifesucks--haha! That is SPOT ON!), Lydia's (the LOLs were perfection!), Mrs. Jennings' ("Matchmaker since the crib"--muahaha!), Ann theBough (that silence!!!), Mr. Palmer's, Mrs. Palmer's...I could go on, but I guess I'd better not as I might end up quoting your entire post, and that would just be silly!! Haha. :)

    Seriously, Naomi, you are SO witty! Thanks for this post! I loved it!! :D

    Oh, yes! And your new header is ADORABLE! Just sayin'. :)

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    1. THIS COMMENT MADE ME SO HAPPY!!! :-)
      Thanks, dear. :-)

      Delete
  22. Heehee, this was indeed quite amusing. :D There were so many I liked. I loved how you left Anne deBourgh's bio silent. And Mr. Collins' "single and ready to mingle." Oh my. :P

    You should do more posts like these! :D

    Your header. YOU HEADER. How...? How did you make such a beautiful header?? I LOVE IT.
    (I actually have that pumpkin background as my iPad background. Isn't it just adorable?)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I'm planning to do more. Call the Midwife, Emma and maybe Cranford are ones I'm excited to attempt next. :-)
      EEK THANKS. I'm quite fond of my new header - it took aaages to make, you have no idea. Especially because it looks so simple. :-)

      Delete
  23. THIS IS AMAZING.
    "@Fitzwilliam_Darcy I often sit in my library." <= HAHAHA. It fits because that's kind of an awkward tagline to have...so it fits Mr. Darcy's awkwardness. :)
    "@AdorableLucySteele Engaged to a Ferras! Life is good!" Made me laugh, too...For some reason, I love any jokes that imply that she cares more about the last name. :)
    I LOVE THIS. It is absolutely genius. Thank you for doing this.

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    1. Also... MY library implies that HE OWNS ONE AHH SWOOON. :-P
      Thank you, dear. :-)

      Delete
  24. These are amazing! I really hope you'll do more and amuse us all ;-)

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  25. This is great!! Thanks for sharing-- this really gave me a good laugh this afternoon. :D
    My favorites are Mr. Darcy, Mr. Palmer, & Mrs. Jennings ("Olives r life! Matchmaker since the crib! Comment if u have any ideas about mysterious Mr F!" --hilariously perfect for her!!).

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  26. Oh! Also, I love your new header! :)

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  27. Ohmygoodness, so I was just thinking amusedly about this post (by the way, that shows that it really is good) and came up with a good one (in my not-so-humble opinion) that I had to share: @SIRwilliamlucas_5: Capital, capital! (Because we all know he's the "capital, capital!" guy. :)

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  28. OHMYGAWSH!! This is seriously the BEST ever!! Since I have for sure seen all three of the Drama's you named this one had me laughing and smiling even more than your most recent! <3 These are all SO WELL DONE!! Gah!! How do you do it??
    XOXO
    http://everythingisbetterwithpolkadots.blogspot.com/

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